I can’t with this funeral.
Right playlist, wrong singer.
I asked for Celine Dion… not Kelly Clarkson.
Kelly!
Stop crying over my casket!
You’ll ruin my makeup…!
OMG… Mother!
My roots are showing!
And pink?
Okay, it’s my go-to color, but not at my funeral!
I said black Versace gown.
Jesus.
Thank God my friends are MIA, I’d just die… even more.
Bradley!
Fiances don’t kiss their dead girlfriend’s best friend!
I swear to God, if it’s the last fucking thing I do,
I’m gonna find a way to haunt all you losers from the grave.
